Your mom slowly starved to death after I took her off my feeding tube.
At first your mom was a little reticent about being blogged. "[name]," she said, "I'm not sure I'm ready for that kind of relationship." Fortunately, she quieted down once she got my blog in her mouth. I blogged her till she begged me to stop, and then till she begged for more; it was her first, best, and last blog. Then I slit her throat and threw her in a ditch. [For a full apologia, click here]
3 Comments:
I don't know if "Blogger her hard" has any kind of threshold for tastelessness but...here's my contribution - When I was forced to defend myself I was torn between saying "she's just a piece of meat" and "she's just a vegetable."
2nd variation: The violently, arrogantly, out of control and complicit judiciary insisted on maintaining she was a vegetable, so we reconciled our rationales and called her a veggie burger.
You are below the threshold. Carry on. =)
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